Most of you already know and have met my sweet little man. He was born on January 5, 2009 at 9:27 AM. It was the most amazing experience. We went in at 7 Sunday. They gave me the pill at 8:30 and at around 10:30 we walked around the hospital and then I took a bath in the jacuzzi tub. The nurse had told me that LeeAnn had written for me to take an Ambien to help me sleep if I needed to. I took it at about 11:30 and then around 2:30 they gave me another pill for my cervix. She had it written to do twice at 6 hours apart. If it didn't work after the 2nd time, we were going to be put on the Pitocin drip at around 9 Monday morning. Well....I woke up about 3:30-3:40 and felt and heard this swoosh sound....water had broke!!! I was so excited and thankful because I did not want to be induced by the Pitocin drip.
Jeremy was asleep and so the nurse and I did our thing for a few minutes before I woke him. I was at 3 cm then. I woke Jeremy and we kinda slept on and off until around 5 when I was having more severe contractions and was in pain. I still was determined not to get an epidural so they have me a shot of pain meds and told me I was dilated to 5 cm. I was still so sleepy from the Ambien and then with the pain meds...I felt so helpless because I just wanted to sleep and couldn't. Jeremy called our parents and my grandparents to let them know we were at 5 and they might want to head our way, but that the nurse said we still had a few hours yet. The contractions came faster and harder from that point. Around 7 I told the nurse I was hurting and asked what my options were instead of the epidural. Luckily LeeAnn had just pulled into the parking lot and was on her way to see me. They checked me and I was 6cm.
When LeeAnn came in, she basically told me that I was at the hardest part of labor and other then an epidural, I was just going to hurt. She understood I didn't want one, but she recommended that I get it so I could try to rest. I agreed, but kept telling the nurse I just felt like I needed to push. It wasn't a pain....but tons of pressure. It was around 7:30 when they came to do the epidural, which they had to do twice because the guy pulled it out taking the tape off of me the first time. When they finished, I still told them...it was not pain, but pressure and we needed to push....so they checked me again at 8 and the nurse said, "Honey, we can't wait for the epidural to take...the baby is on the way and you are ready to push..." I told Jeremy, I knew it!!!
We started pushing and only pushed for about an hour and ten minutes. I then realized that my legs were going numb and asked LeeAnn what was going on. She told me that the epidural was starting to work....too little too late. I also didn't know that Riley's cord was wrapped around his neck twice, but everything turned out okay. So after 6 very exciting hours, my beautiful son arrived and the feeling that I had....well....I just can't describe.
I wondered often during my pregnancy how I could love someone so much that I had never met, but now I wonder how I ever lived without him in my life and how just looking at him I can cry because Jeremy and I made him out of nothing but love and how he just captured my heart.
We're noticing slight changes in him daily. He lifts his head a little now and just will sit and look at us when he is awake. I wonder what is going through his mind. My favorite thing is when I am feeding him; he just watches me and gazes at me. That is the time I usually shed a few tears because I am so amazed at him. The bond that took place instantly between him and us and then with the three of us is unremarkable. People tell you that there is nothing like childbirth, but it is more than childbirth. There is nothing like becoming a family. It's the three of us now and now matter what happens we will take it head on as a team.
The first two nights at home he was in his Pack N Play in our room. Last night he was in his bed...I didn't sleep a wink!!! Hercules has been okay towards him, but I was so afraid I would go to sleep and not hear him or that Hercules would get in the bed with him. I felt so helpless because he was sleeping away and didn't need me and I was just being paranoid. I then realized that if I can't stand him being a wall away at night, how will I ever stand him being in daycare with a stranger all day....ugh!! It's only week one and I already don't want to leave him....what will I do in March????
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