The 5AM Blues...

I know you're thinking I'm crazy for blogging at 5AM and eating Captain Crunch Berries. I gave in to the insomnia and finally got up. For whatever reason after my normal 4AM trip to the bathroom, I couldn't go back to sleep. The anxiety continues I suppose. Today is my last day of work until March 23rd. Yes Mom and Woody...I have fullfilled my plan on schedule with the help of Riley and lots of determination. I'm wondering if I have passed on my need to have a "plan" to him. Not sure if that is a good thing or a bad thing. Jeremy pretty much goes with the flow and I have to know what is going on and plan for everything! Maybe he will be a happy medium of both. The last few weeks have been nothing but an emotional ride. Anxiety, excitement, fear..you name it, I've felt it. I think it's taking a toll on Jeremy now. Today is his birthday and with all the baby happenings he is full of different emotions too.

I'd like to think I've held it together pretty well during the pregnancy, but I would have to say this last month has been the hardest. All of the different emotions and feelings are completely unexpected. Some people have them the whole time, but thankfully I've been able to keep my sanity until now.

I will make my last "have-to" trip across the state line to Dalton this morning for the next 11 and a half weeks and I will have my last lunch with the girls today at Chili's before becoming a Mommy. I'm not going to miss the work portion I don't think too much, I will have my hands full, but I will miss the adult interaction I'm sure. And just how much HGTV will I be able to tolerate??

We can only hope that next year will be better and more delightful with our new addition to the family. It's been a rough year with my Mom's divorcce, my uncle passing, my other uncle being in the hospital for months (he is still there by the way), Powpaw Keller passing and just the normal stress of life and unneccessary events.

As the year closes today, I wish everyone a Happy New Year. I ask that you keep Jeremy and I in your thoughts and prayers the next few days as we near parenthood and the turning of a new chapter..The Unknown! I'm praying that things will take normal courses and we won't need to be induced on Sunday. If there is one dissappointment that will be it. I wanted more then anything to experience the excitement of going to the hospital and having to make all of those phone calls saying "He's on his way!!" But I know that if LeeAnn recommends the induction course, then it is for the best for Riley and me. Stupid old blood pressure! Hopefully the pills will work and we won't have to have the drip. Who knows??

Have a safe and Happy New Year....

Less then a week!!!

We are well on our way to becoming parents...I know I've said before that reality has set in, but honestly it is here and coming on us so fast!! We went to LeeAnn today, so thankful we made it while she was out of town. I am still dilated 1cm...for the second week. My blood pressure is still high, but no protein or salt in my urine. LeeAnn advised us that if Riley hasn't made his grand entrance by Sunday, we are going to be put in the hospital at 7PM.
She will give me medicine in a pill form to get things moving so that I can still eat and move around. If that doesn't get things going fast enough then Monday morning they will give me the drip. We're hoping he comes on his own before then, but if it is meant to be then it is meant to be. We appreciate everyone's thoughts and prayers and hope you continue to do so for us as we start this journey.

3 weeks and counting

So...we have 3 weeks from tomorrow until our due date...will we make it?? Only time will tell. It's really hard to believe that the months have gone by so fast. The small things are becoming so apparent now. Just today, I was doing laundry and realized that the next time I have to buy detergent I'm going to be a Mommy. I'm trying to enjoy each day as it passes, but am becoming so anxious I can't stand it! I have serious nesting syndrome...I mopped the entire house between yesterday and today...Jeremy was so mad. I have tried to limit myself to keep from progressing the labor since Jeremy is out of town until Tuesday and LeeAnn is leaving, but I don't know how much longer I can go without just going on this cleaning rampage!!!!

Last Monday was my scheduled visit with LeeAnn. My blood pressure was still high and my protein levels elevated. So she sent me over to the hospital for monitoring. I had no idea what to think. We were there for a couple of hours and eventually my blood pressure started to lower. Riley was fine and made sure we knew he was there. We then went back to the hospital on Wednesday night. I'm embarrassed to say, but we thought my water was breaking. It turned out to be the outer layer of my water sac that was leaking. So, I spent up into the wee hours of the morning at the hospital walking and being checked for fluid. Better safe then sorry, but we learned I was dilated 1cm. YEAH!! Oh, and my blood pressure was fine and no protein when we were there!!

We had to go back to LeeAnn's on Friday for an ultrasound and to be put on the monitor again. Things were okay actually. My blood pressure was still good with no protein. I was so excited. LeeAnn okayed for me to continue to work until our next visit. We just floating from one visit to the next. The ultrasound showed that Riley has hair!! It was sticking out from his head...it was so awesome. The ultrasound tech said that his head was really in my pelvis...I guess that explains why I have been a little uncomfortable?? Just cross your fingers that he holds on until LeeAnn gets back from New York on the 28th.

Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers about my blood pressure and protein...I hope I can keep it under control. We have such awesome family and friends...we love you all and so will Riley!!!

The Clock Keeps Ticking....

We are approaching our 36th week of pregnancy and let me tell you...I can feel it. For the most part, I feel great. I'm having some blood pressure and fluid retention issues. I had an unplanned visit with LeeAnn this week due to a severe headache and swelling of my feet and hands for two days. She said that at this point she normally would recommend bed rest until delivery....not what I have in mind!! She did say that if we can make it through next week, then Riley can come into the world at home in Cleveland and not in Chattanooga.

I started crying and so we met in the middle and now I have until Monday to get a grasp on my blood pressure and drink all the water I can stand to filter out the excess protein and salt. My only thought is...I do not know how to control my blood pressure. Everyone says rest rest rest....OK. If I'm resting, my mind is going around and around with the things I could be doing not to mention my very frequent trips to the bathroom due to my water intake. I can't help but think this is somehow my fault that this has happened and now I'm risking time away from my baby because of silly old stress. If you know me at all, then you know I'm naturally a stressed out person and a worry wort. I'm supposed to be resting and taking it easy...but I'm worrying about getting this under control making it past Christmas for my delivery. Did I mention LeeAnn is going to New York on Christmas Eve and will back on the 28th??? Yes...very important that I don't go into labor before then.

So, I'm taking today off from work...luckily I already had a vacation day planned. I slept until 10:30!! I feel like I have wasted the whole day...but I'm actually enjoying it. Jeremy went ahead to the cabin last night. I convinced him to go...he'll be back Saturday instead of Sunday. We agreed to dinner Saturday night...my only outing for the weekend. Well, I'm sure the grocery store will be in my path somewhere. I promised him not to do too much while I'm home. I did say the laundry would get done and the filing cabinet cleaned out for the year. Other then that, if I take a notion to do something minor then I will.

I can't say enough about how great he has been through the pregnancy. He goes with me to my visits no matter how minor they are. It's been a challenge putting all the baby stuff together. Just the other day he swore the Pack-N-Play came out of the box broke. He had fastened the bottom before pulling the sides. I was supposed to be off of my feet, but I had to get up and show him how to start putting it together. He even reads to Riley at night! I love it! Jeremy is my best friend, but our relationship has matured so much during this experience. I wouldn't change a thing. So Riley, I hope that we make you proud to call us your parents.

Okay, so I've been a bit of a slacker posting this month. We've been pretty busy getting things together. We've had 2 of 3 Baby Shower's so far. Believe me...Riley has more then enough clothes to wear! We have been so blessed with all the great gifts at each shower. I worried that we wouldn't get all of the "essentials" to get started, but our family and friends have made is so easy for us.

We've also finished the nursery....ahead of schedule I might add. Well, ahead of my schedule. I had wanted everything finished by Thanksgiving and things have been finished since the 16th! Everything is neatly in place and waiting the arrival of it's owner. We're still going every 2 weeks to the doctor, which the weeks are going by so slow right now!

My total weight gain is 15 pounds so far. Although, I can still tie my own shoes and shave my legs!! We have 7 weeks left if we make it to our due date. My last day of work is December 31st..providing we make it that long. I hope so!! Riley is getting cramped in my stomach. There are times when one side of my stomach sticks out and then he moves and it evens back out. It's so funny to watch.

My anxiety levels are increased a bit getting so close to Riley's arrival. We're so excited too...Jeremy is beside himself with excitement waiting on his son. I'm gonna miss him calling me his beautiful pregnant wife. I can't even begin to explain how great he has been. If he shows half as much support in raising Riley, I think we'll do just fine.

I'm a little late in putting up the tree. Anyone that knows me can tell you that I put it up the first weekend in November and leave it up until well after the New Year. Jeremy put it together in the garage before he left to go hunting and Popa helped me get it in the house today. We almost didn't do the tree thinking we wouldn't get to take it down before Riley gets here, but I just couldn't help it. I will probably take it down earlier then I normally do just in case.

We don't go back to the doctor until December 1st so I'll let you know our progress. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers as we prepare for this journey.

Good things must come to an end...

Well, we finished our birthing classes tonight. It's sad to say, but I'm going to miss going and being around other people that are going through similar things that Jeremy and I are. Most people that have children can relate, but to be around people going through it at the same time is so much different. We got all kinds of goodies tonight! A diaper bag filled with formula, diapers, wipes, coupons...you name it....even a guide to giving a bath and what to take to the hospital. We did sign up for the car seat safety that is next Tuesday.

I am washing my third load of baby clothes!! They smell so good...I just want to roll in them. Jeremy and I cannot stay out of the nursery, it's almost ridiculous. Well, I just wanted to share that we were through with class and baby clothes are being washed. We see LeeAnn in a couple of days so hopefully I will have something interesting to report.

The months flew by when we were going once a month, but this every two weeks is going by so slow...I guess I should enjoy the next 9 weeks and try to relax. Yeah right! I keep myself up at night with anxious thoughts of what is to come and what all needs to be done.

The clock keeps a ticking...

We are slowly approaching the big change in our life. We will be at 31 weeks this week and for the first time...I really feel pregnant. What I mean is over the last 3 days, I have experienced kicks in the ribs, back aches and not being able to get comfortable in the bed! I have had days that I just felt "off" and tired, but these past fews days have been different. I'm still loving the pregnancy though. I just assume that Riley is running out of room and he doesn't mean to make Mommy feel uncomfortable.

Jeremy and I had some maternity pictures done a couple of weeks ago. Aunt Vicki graciously did them for us. It was a blast. The nursery is now complete with new paint and a new floor. It also has a very cute baby bed in place between the windows. I'm very proud of Jeremy. It only took us about an hour and half to get the bed and the drawer put together. I then put the rug that matches the theme in front of the bed and Jeremy just couldn't resist putting the lamp on the table and turning it on. We left it on all night. I also put Riley's Pottery Barn Chair together. Hercules even got excited over the new furnishings of the room.Things are falling into place and if we keep it up we will be ahead of schedule at completing the room. My goal was to be complete by the end of November so that all I had to do in December was wash baby clothes and rest.

We go back to the doctor on Thursday. We are now going every two weeks. The last time we went she said Riley was about 2 pounds or a little over and she also said his head was down. I was worried because I thought oh my gosh he is going to be early. Little did I know, this was normal and he could change positions still. Our final birthing class is tomorrow. Some people say that they are a waste of time, but I think differently. Sure, they can't tell you exactly what is going to happen during your labor, but they can give you an idea of the "process". It has been very helpful to Jeremy and me especially being first time parents. Jeremy has paid very close attention to what his role is and how he can help during those painful moments. I knew he was, but wasn't for sure until last night at 3AM when he was rubbing my back the way she demonstrated in class. I felt so loved and just his thoughtfulness made the aches subside to some degree.

Pumpkin Party

Well, Kaylee will be 3 on the 28th. I can't believe and I know Beth can't. She is growing up so fast, but as you can see she has the funnest birthday parties. The pumpkin painting party was a hit! Kudos to Beth for thinking of it. It puts a lot in perspective for me. Watching 20+ children run around and have a blast makes me wish more and more for Riley to be here.

It seems like yesterday I was on my way to the hospital to greet this little princess that belongs to my best friend. I didn't know that holding her those few moments would open my heart to her. Maybe I'm being partial, but if I'm faulty for that...oh well.

If one person takes to Riley this way, then I know he will always be okay and have support in not only family, but friends. You have those people in your lives that float in and out, but the ones that remain constant are the true blessings in life.

Have a wonderful birthday Kaylee!!

Well, I'd like to say I was blogging this morning to post pictures of Riley. Most of you know that Jeremy's Powpaw Keller passed away Saturday. He'd been battling prostate cancer for 5 years and lost that battle over the weekend. We are so thankful to have been given the time we had with him.

The last three weeks have been rough as things started to decline. The family took shifts to stay with him and the first week of October they brought him a hospital bed. He became very restless this last week and a half with anxiety and demencia. You have to over look those things and at times some of the things he would say seemed kinda funny.

Jeremy's night was on Thursdays to stay with Powpaw. I went over there for a visit and he was out on the porch. The first time in over a year and a half that he wanted to be outside other than to go to the doctor. When I was about to leave, he kept telling me that I could just stay and then he'd say I could come back in a few minutes. I tried to tell him that Jeremy said I needed beauty sleep, but his sweet answer was "No you don't. He doesn't know what he is talking about."

So I let him feel my belly for the first time to feel Riley and he hollared, "Come on boy!" He slept all through the night Thursday and was on the porch with Jeremy first thing Friday morning. Then in the early afternoon he drifted into a coma-like state with heavy breathing. So my official last conversation with him was Thursday, but I am so thankful that Jeremy was able to savor the last morning with him (awake and alert) on the porch.

We all said our goodbyes to him Friday as it was believed he wasn't going to make it though the night, but he held on for just a bit longer. The Hospice nurse was so wonderful during this time. I commend anyone who takes that field of work. She developed a fondness to Powpaw and you can tell she cared about him and us when she hugged us and cried right along.

All of the arrangements have been made and the next two days will be rough, but we all know he is in a better place and is no longer in pain. He is an angel to watch over us. One of the hardest things is knowing he will not get to meet his first great grandchild. My emotions are on overload due to the pregnancy, but it pains me to no extreme to see my husband breaking. He was okay on Sunday for the most part and will probably be okay today. Tomorrow for the funeral as in any case will be the toughest.

These things bring along an up and down rollar coaster. You are saddened for the loss, but relieved because he isn't hurting anymore. Is it normal to feel guilt on the portion of relief? I guess so. I've been up sinc a little after 5 this morning doing laundry and watching Father of the Bride....it's 6:30 now. I would love to be sleeping, but for whatever reason I haven't been able to get much for the last 5 days. I know, I know....nerves and stress. It's all a cycle that we know is going to happen, but by no means does it make it easier.

I just want to thank every one for their thoughts and prayers during this process. The arrangements are below.

Ralph Buckner Funeral Home in Cleveland, TN. 10-13-08 visitation for the family at 4 and the public from 5-8. The funeral will be on 10-14-08 at 2PM with the graveside at Sunset.

Riley's New Outfits

Okay, I know....I shouldn't keep buying stuff for Riley. These were too cute! Jeremy caught me on the phone with Beth and playing on the computer...so he decided to get a pic of the sweater. It is so soft! My favorite is the button down with the jeans...I bet he will be so handsome when he wears them! Only two days until our next 3-D...can't wait!!

***For those of you that get this via email....don't forget to click on the link "The Sharp Family" and see all of our post.***

Reality Check

Okay, so we went for our 6 month visit today. We had the so-called dreadful sugar test. Honestly, I loved it...I had a Fruit Punch flavor. It only took a minute to drink and didn't taste bad at all. I gained 4 pounds last month and LeeAnn said that Riley is now about 2 pounds!

We talked about pediatricians and other fun stuff. We started talking about what all is going to happen at the hospital...I'm so excited! We have to go back in 3 weeks and from that point we start going every 2 weeks. So....reality is sinking in that we don't have that much time left for just the two of us. We will soon have another person to take care of. It's frightening but exciting all at the same time.I cried most of the way to work after the visit. I know, what a wimp. It's weird. I miss and love him so much and he isn't even here yet. I'm even dreaming about him and finally the other night saw him in my dream. We will see if he actually looks like what I saw.

LeeAnn and I talked about me not having an epidural. So, she said she would request a jacuzzi room at the hospital in case I wanted to use it. I have a very open mind that I may not be able to do it without anything. I'm sure going to try my best! We are starting birthing classes on October 20th for 4 weeks on Monday nights. I'll let you know how we do.

Jeremy is already a "pro" at breathing techniques...so he thinks. If I could express how he does it in words, I would certainly try. It is the funniest thing ever, but I think it is cute. I know he will keep the excitement alive throughout the entire adventure. We also pre-registered at the hospital today. We go Friday for some more 3-D pics...I will post them as soon as I can!

Big Kicks

Okay, today has been a very beautiful day. Dacia and I attended the Team Building Activites at Red Clay State Park for work. The weather was great!

In the world of Riley, things were rather calm yesterday. I was a little concerned last night because he usually is very active before bed, but he was relaxing I guess. He has made up for it today. I'm thinking it was the cool air and Granny's homemade veggie soup and corn bread. He kicked like crazy after Jeremy and I ate tonight. It was the biggest and strongest kicks so far. I love it! It is so amazing to watch my stomach just bounce. I'm sure as the weeks and final months go by, the kicks will become more painful, but for now they are my joy and connection to my son.

I love it that Jeremy can visually see what I feel. We as women get to feel everything during a pregnancy. As a Daddy, they depend on us to help them bond with the baby before birth. It is the funniest thing to watch Jeremy watch my stomach. Then I start giggling and my belly moves making it hard to see the kicks. It is so hard not to get tickled when he kicks.

Okay, so am I crazy for going on and on about these mysterious movements of a baby?? If I am, then I am. These moments are the ones that keep my sanity in check from the worries of a normal day and our future of being parents. I'm so thankful for Beth getting me into the blog world. I have a private journal that will be just for Riley from me, but hopefully blogging can be my lifeline to friends and family that I don't see often.

Highs & Lows

I'm finding that my thoughts during the pregnancy are going from one extreme to the other. I get so excited and then I'm scared to death of what is to come. I'm enjoying being pregnant so much that I'm scared for it to end, but then I can't wait to meet my beautiful son. Jeremy & I have both talked about how our lifestyle is going to change, which is fine. I think we both worry that we will lose touch with one another. I'm sure all of that is normal and most couples experience similar thoughts, but I'm a worrier.

We are making progress on the nursery. It is ready to get primered, painted and floored. Then Jeremy gets to put all of the furniture together...how fun!

Riley is actively kicking throughout the day. Some times are like clock work like 9Am and 9PM...so yes, he is kicking and playing right now as I type. Within the last week Jeremy and I have seen my belly moving. It is the neatest thing on earth!!It's one thing to feel a kick but to see my stomach roll when he moves...I just can't explain it. I also feel like I have all of a sudden gotten a stomach...it just keeps growing. I love it! We are scheduled to go to the doctor next week and also scheduled to do the second 3-D ultrasound. I'll post photos up when I get them.

23 weeks and counting....

Okay, so we did the 3-D ultrasound. We were at 22 weeks and they are so cute. We are going back in about a month. I can't wait to see how much more developed he is. Jeremy is getting more excited by the day. He bought the cutest outfit that says,"If you think I'm handsome, you should see my Daddy." I know, how sweet!

My belly is gradually getting bigger. Finally! I feel like it appeared at one time. I can still wear some of my normal close, but am getting used to the comfy maternity outfits. My sides have been achy for the last week or so. I'm assuming it is from the stretching of my muscles and stomach. My father-in-law has been so anxious for my stomach to poke out so he can call me "pumpkin belly." I was teasing Jeremy this weekend that I was going to paint my stomach for Halloween like a pumpkin. I really had him going, but I'm too conservative for that.

Riley continues to kick and move around like crazy and I love it! We also crossed the point last month when he is supposed to be able to hear us now. I talk to him when I'm driving down the road and I bet people are thinking that girl is nuts. I've been reading him books at night before bed in the hopes he will love to read like me. Most of them have been children's books, but he has also been exposed to Nora Roberts.

We are making progress in getting ready for his arrival. I have to buy a couple of things furniture wise, but we're getting there. We don't go back to the doctor until October the 7th for a check-up and the sugar test.

What a shocker!!

Okay, Kristal and I have been friends since the 5th grade. Today she calls me and starts telling me about her and James' trip to Hawaii last week. I know, I'm jealous too. Well, she tells me they got engaged on Tuesday. I was stoked!! I kept rambling about how excited I was and I hear her say they got married on Thursday in Maui!!!!! I yelled WHAT?? Then I was speachless....Anyway, it is so awesome that this has happened. I think it is sweet and couldn't see her doing it any other way. I'm only sad I couldn't be there:(

Nothing really is new with Riley today. It has been another astonishing day of being pregnant, which I love very much. He has been moving a lot this afternoon. I ate pizza and I think it disagreed with us, but we love popsicles!! Hercules is on my belly right now. I think he is getting attached to Riley and he isn't even here yet. Just the last month or so he has started being very loving and comforting. His purring soothes Riley and I love it!

We're going for our first set of 3-D ultrasound pics on Friday and I will post them up as soon as possible.

Labor Day

We had a great Labor Day weekend. Jeremy went to the cabin with the men in the family to get ready for this deer season. While he was there, I went to Granny and Popa's until Sunday. I spent Friday evening with Beth and Kaylee. Kaylee in case you don't know, is the cutest girl on earth!! I bought her the new Little Mermaid movie and from what I hear has been a hit!!!! We registered for baby Riley at Target.

Kaylee wanted to come home with me, but all 3 of us knew that she would want Mommy as soon as we left the parking lot. Popa and I took off Saturday to Crossville. It ws nice just to spend the day with him. We haven't done that in a while. He is the sweetest man on earth! We were gone most of the day and took the long way home, which resulted in a nice juicy watermelon for me and baby Riley. I just finished it by the way.

I came home Sunday and was able to cook Jeremy a good meal. Apparently, he didn't get good food at the cabin. We had breakfast together at Cracker Barrel on Monday morning and then proceeded to register at Wal-Mart. I never knew how much stuff we could register for! Then sadly we spent the evening watching the Tennessee vs. UCLA game. Jeremy gave up on me about half way through, but I stuck it out...better luck next time guys.

We made it to the blog world!

I feel like the last person on earth to start blogging and will try to make updates as frequently as possible. We both work full-time and have been trying to get things in gear for the arrival of baby Riley. He is due January 12th and we can't wait!

Jeremy has been so awesome this entire time. At times, he is so sweet but he also keeps me laughing if I am feeling tired or emotional. Just last week he got up at 5:30 AM on his day off to get me breakfast. I know, how sweet! He and I both talk to Riley every day and tell him how much we can't wait to see him and how much we love him. I feel so blessed to have him and everyone around me to celebrate this miracle of life.

We had our 5 month visit today and all is well. My BP was a little low, but Riley's heart beat was great! Next month I have the awful sugar test (everyone warns me about this)...and we also start discussing birthing classes, pediatricians and our hospital plan. I can't believe how fast the time is flying. The last 5 months have flown by and I can't imagine how the years are going to fly once he arrives.